5 Terrible Life Moments When You Will Wish You Were in Hawaii
There is an endless array of tasks to be done. Gone are the days when you can sleep until noon, feed yourself left over pizza, seven days a week and spend every day of summer lounging in the tall grass reading books.
Suddenly, there are spreadsheets and meal plans and your vacation days have shrunk so far that you need a magnifying glass to find them.
Of course, dealing with life is what we do. But, when it all gets a bit much, this could be fate telling you that you need to pack your bags and flee to Hawaii for a break. Yep, the following times are a sure sign that the azure skies, warm waters and white sands are the only way to go…
When you wake up without coffee in the house
You stumble from a hazy sleep into the kitchen. It’s cold outside. You have had to drag yourself from the bowels of your duvet and shake off those three glasses of wine from the night before. You know there is only one thing that can save you – the sweet, delirious and rejuvenating taste of coffee.
But, in the coffee container lies a single forlorn bean.
You sink to your knees; the coffee god has forsaken you. Fortunately, over in Hawaii, coffee literally grows on trees. In Kona alone, there are hundreds of coffee farms and strolling through those aromatic lands can be one of the best Hawaii tours for coffee lovers. You can prance joyously through the bean laden bushes, before guzzling liters and liters of the black stuff.
When the closest beach is a bathtub and kitty litter tray
If you find yourself snorkeling in the tub, trying to pretend that stray floating hair is actually a sea horse, or making sandcastles with the sifting thingie in the urine-stained cat litter tray – then there is a problem.
Landlocked individuals don’t understand the importance of hitting the shore. The sea breeze, the salty waves, the ability to swim with dolphins, and the soft sugar spun sands can literally make you feel born again.
Hawaii is brimming with beautiful beaches. Whether you want to ride some waves down at Waikiki or Mai Tai’s in a hammock are more your thing, Hawaii has a wild plethora of beaches in every style. From black volcanic sands to Hawaiian honeymoon bliss bays, the choices are endless.
When you love to surf, but your nearest ocean resembles a pancake
Speaking of surf and waves, for all those die-hard surfers out there who can’t catch a local break, we feel your pain.
There is nothing worse than driving four hours to your nearest swell to witness an ocean that resembles a rippling mirror.
You, of course, have driven all this way so you squeeze every morsel of flesh into that wetsuit and paddle out into the freezing cold flat abyss. At this moment, you are sure to wish that you were on vacation in Kauai, whipping around on an adventurous Kauai helicopter tour, where the views are a constant tour de force, the waters a blissful blue and the endless summer an actual way of life.
The Hawaiian surf scene boasts the infamous North Shore, endless world class surf competitions and waves that surge and swell all day. You don’t even need to wake up early to catch a few peelers. Take a look at some places that you should be sure to check out, unless, of course, you are someone who wants to pull out the big guns Slater-style.
When winter coming is not just a GOT catch phrase
Winter is coming and unless you are of House Stark, with a dire wolf at your side and a swish fur cloak to strut about in, then these very words will bring dread.
Suddenly, the joy of lingering summer nights, open windows, wild swimming and carefree days are replaced with whimpering while wearing every layer you own, living with a perpetual central heating headache and feeling like you can never leave the house again, lest you resemble Jack Nicolson frozen in a bush at the end of The Shining.
Hawaii laughs in the face of winter. While most of the world shivers under a duvet until May, Hawaii might occasionally require an incredibly light sweater in the evening. But, as a little apology, Hawaii ensures that all the hibiscus flowers are in bloom to compensate.
Sure, it rains a tad more, come the winter months. But, to be honest, these short spurts of warm droplets falling from the sky will make you want to go out dancing and capturing rainbows.
It’s like swapping out Winterfell under Ramsey Bolton rule to go party in the free lands of Braavos. Valur Morghulis. Yeah, all men must die. But, it doesn’t need to be knee deep in snow when it can be drunk on rum in the shadow of a volcano.
While we are talking about the dream boat that is Ramsey Bolton, let’s take a moment to celebrate our fave Game of Thrones villains right now…
When you realize you have watched everything on Netflix- twice
OK, we all love Netflix, especially as we are the type of people who believe Netflix and chill literally means donning your best sweatpants and binge watching all those Dutch detective shows.
If you find yourself chopping off a few fingers, so you can call in sick to work and finish watching OITB or weeping over the fifth Nicolas Cage film you’ve watched in a row, then this really needs to stop right now.
Flying to Hawaii and immersing yourself in great Hawaiian vacation activities is the only thing to save your soul. Swap out Jersey Shore for an actual shore line. Spend your days hiking volcanoes, riding horses across the sand or watching whales belly flop in the ocean. Trust us, it is so much better seeing these things in real life, as opposed to watching a discount Netflix documentary about it.
PS the only way to get over the actual heartbreak that was Black Fish is to go and see whales in the actual wild.
Hawaii may not be the answer to all of your problems, but it can sure help. There is something about sweet sea air, picturesque palm trees, ice cold beers and volcano peaks that seem to make you shrug nervous breakdowns away. If you find yourself turning into Michael Douglas from Falling Down, then perhaps it’s time to book that trip to paradise.